True Life

So this is cancer? Dizzy, sleepy, emotional, exhausting...cancer. Honestly, cancer sucks. From day to day it never gets much easier and I hate to see the strain it puts on my mom. It's almost like with each sunrise it's a new realization that she is carrying the battle, and while I pray for her strength, sometimes I think it is easier to get sucked into the pity party. Cancer has a way of doing that you know. Even though we want OUR control over the situation, things seem to happen everyday we would never put in our plans. 

Eventually you have to give the battle over to someone who has battled much worse. You have to hand control over to the ULTIMATE healer: God. I pray everyday for God to keep this family together and strong within Him. With our fragile state, one slip up and we'd all crumble into a million pieces. I know God didn't want this sickness for my mom. He wanted a perfect world. But for now, these are the cards we've been dealt and we have to play them the best we know how or else we can fold under the pressure. You have to make that decision for your life. To crumble because the life you picked out for yourself isn't playing out just right or to wake up every day and fight like heck to make it work with a smile on your face. I think about the people in Japan today. Do you think they had a choice? Everything they had was swept right from under their feet within seconds. Their entire city destroyed, as if it never even existed. You can't plan for that, but God can.

I heard a couple of quotes today that have really seemed to stick:

"The world is broken, God is not."

"If things aren't right, God's not done."

I know God has a plan for my mom and our family, even though it's really hard to see right now. He has gotten us this far and I have full faith that He will continue to pull us through many more struggles along the way. I thank everyone for the continued prayers and support, it has meant so much to us.

Please join me in the fight againt breast cancer and consider supporting me in the 2011 Susan G. Komen 3-day Walk for a Cure. In October, I'll be walking 60 miles over a period of 3 days to raise awareness for breast cancer. In order to walk, I must raise 2,300 dollars. For more information or to make a donation, visit www.the3day.org/goto/sagehutch

Spilled Time

So many changes from week to week, yet I still find my mom becoming more beautiful as each day goes on. She has officially lost ALL of her prized pixie hair but has desperately been on a search for a wig to replace what she has lost. I can promise you we have been to EVERY wig shop in Dothan. For the African-American, Chinese, Japanese, whatever ethnicity, we have been to the store and tried on at LEAST 5 of their wigs...none of which brought that spark back into my moms eyes. I said it was like picking out a wedding dress (even though I've never done that) maybe you had to try on a million untill you put on one that became "THE one". Needless to say we looked and looked untill we came across the perfect one at Lovely Locks today, a new boutique in Dothan targeted towards cancer patients. Although it's not at all the pixie cut she left behind, this is a new season of her life and a new season calls for a new doo!

When I made the decision to take a semester off of school to help out with my mom, I knew all the "cons" of my choice. I'd be behind in school. I'd leave my friends behind. I'd leave my job behind. I'd have to give up what I started just to start all over. But the cons? The cons are nothing. This time with my mom has been so precious. I wouldn't trade a day, an hour, any bit of this time I am getting to spend with my mom. Good days and bad days. I get to sit back an observe. My mom just enjoys every small bit of life now. I watched as the tears streamed down her face because she was able to get a "human hair" wig-cut on her head today--it made her feel like an average woman. I watch her savor every single bite of food she puts in her mouth, McDonalds Fruit and Maple Oatmeal has been a hit! I mean, just so many things we take for granted my mom now says is all part of her "Bucket-List". If that doesn't inspire you I'm not sure what else could. Time has become such a precious thing to our family and I couldn't think of a better way to spend my time than with her.

I have made the decision to participate in the Susan G. Komen 3-Day Run for the Cure to raise awareness for Breast Cancer and support the foundation. I am walking a 60 mile journey over the course of 3-days in honor of my mother. This event takes place in October. I plan to begin other fundraising acts, but donations will also be a BIG help. In order to walk, I must raise 2,300 dollars which entirely goes towards the Breast Cancer Foundation to help find a cure and save others from this battle. If you are able to help, please go to www.the3day.org/goto/sagehutch. Thank you!